{"id":165,"date":"2023-05-01T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2023-05-01T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/staging.mabelslabels.com\/blog\/2019\/01\/11\/an-introverts-guide-to-surviving-the-schoolyard\/"},"modified":"2023-07-20T18:50:42","modified_gmt":"2023-07-20T18:50:42","slug":"an-introverts-guide-to-surviving-the-schoolyard-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mabelslabels.com\/blog\/2023\/05\/01\/an-introverts-guide-to-surviving-the-schoolyard-2\/","title":{"rendered":"An Introvert’s Guide to Schoolyard Interactions"},"content":{"rendered":"

I am an introvert by nature. I cherish any time I can spend alone in a quiet house, preferably in my pajamas. I don\u2019t feel comfortable in crowds, and I\u2019m not the type to strike up a conversation with someone I don\u2019t know.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Because of this, I dreaded the schoolyard pick-up and drop-off scene. There are no buses to my kids\u2019 school, so twice a day the blacktop is covered in adults milling around, waiting for the bell to ring. It\u2019s like an awkward psychological experiment (or maybe an amateur flash mob) waiting to happen.<\/p>\n

When my older son started kindergarten, I kept my head down and didn\u2019t interact with anyone. The whole situation was foreign and unknown to me, so I stayed in my shell. The other worry-inducing factor was my younger son, who was along for the ride every day in his stroller. Like most toddlers, his moods and behaviour were volatile, and I desperately wanted to avoid a public meltdown \u2013 and the ensuing stares. I got in and out as swiftly as I could.<\/p>\n

As my kids got older, though, I gained more confidence. My younger son started kindergarten and the routine felt familiar. At school events and field trips, I learned the names of my kids\u2019 peers, and took note of which parents they ran to at the end of the day. I began to shyly say hi to moms and dads that I recognized.<\/p>\n

Many years later, it surprises even me to admit that I\u2019m no longer super-stressed about the schoolyard. I have chatted with a variety of parents and discovered that people are actually quite interesting. Who knew? (The extroverts, I guess.)<\/p>\n

For example, one mom is from Argentina, and another is from Colombia. I met a mom who has no hair due to an autoimmune disease (and she was kind enough to let me interview her about it<\/a>). One of the dads is a firefighter, and another is on the verge of completing his Ph.D. One mom rides a skateboard, and another has a job making \u2013 of all things \u2013 drones. We all share the same square of asphalt.<\/p>\n

If you\u2019re on the shy side too, here are my amateur tips for navigating the schoolyard:<\/p>\n

Consider pandemic protocols.<\/strong><\/p>\n

In many regions, physical distancing is still highly recommended, so be courteous and provide plenty of personal space. Also, be sensitive to the fact that people may still feel nervous or jittery as they return to social situations (and who can blame us, after months of living like hermits?).<\/p>\n

Ask about them \u2013 and their kids.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Most people are keen to talk about themselves, and even more excited if someone inquires about their kids. Ask how their child\u2019s school year is going or what extra-curricular activities they\u2019re involved in \u2013 anything to get a conversation started. If you\u2019re a private person, you don\u2019t have to share a lot \u2013 just listen.<\/p>\n

Figure out who\u2019s who.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Seek out the family members of the kids your son or daughter frequently mentions when discussing the events of the day. It\u2019s helpful to make connections with your child\u2019s friends, especially if you receive an invitation to a birthday party or playdate. Pay extra attention to determine if you\u2019re meeting a parent, step-parent, grandparent or other caregiver.<\/p>\n

Be yourself.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Another reason that I held back from parent interactions was that I often felt frumpy and unkempt. I used to tear myself down by imagining how a style-conscious parent might describe me to someone else: \u201cNo makeup, messy ponytail, same black yoga pants every single day.\u201d As you might expect, this did nothing for my self-esteem. Eventually I got over it and realized that this isn\u2019t a fashion contest, and even if it is, I\u2019m not interested in entering.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t judge.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Avoid shaking your head (outwardly or inwardly) at the parent who appears overly frazzled or is dashing for the door at the bell<\/a>, because that could be you tomorrow. You don\u2019t know every family\u2019s backstory or the challenges they might be facing, so err on the side of being forgiving.<\/p>\n

Parents in a schoolyard are all in the same boat. We all lead busy lives and we\u2019re doing the best we can. I understand if you\u2019re not keen on mingling, but my advice is to start small, on your own terms. It turns out that if you keep your eyes up and your mind open, you\u2019re likely to meet some very nice people.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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