{"id":852,"date":"2017-05-11T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2017-05-11T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/staging.mabelslabels.com\/blog\/2017\/05\/11\/still-talking-drinking\/"},"modified":"2020-12-15T19:57:08","modified_gmt":"2020-12-15T19:57:08","slug":"still-talking-drinking","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mabelslabels.com\/blog\/2017\/05\/11\/still-talking-drinking\/","title":{"rendered":"Still Talking about the Drinking"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"A<\/p>\n

A few months ago I wrote a blog called \u201cMoms, Let\u2019s Talk About the Drinking<\/a>.\u201d I hoped it would start a conversation among those of us who\u2019d decided \u2013 or realized \u2013 we were drinking too much.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Hundreds of comments and one radio interview later, it\u2019s mission accomplished. Among my circle of friends and readers, we are talking more openly about our drinking and being more mindful of our habits.<\/p>\n

This is a subject that is close to my heart (also my liver).<\/p>\n

In January of this year, as a series of events and realizations started stacking up, I came to the conclusion that I had a problem. I was drinking too much and even worse, I was oblivious to the culture of consumption I\u2019d created in my home and in front of my young children.<\/p>\n

When talking about problem drinking I shared several stories about how careless both my husband and I were about what we were saying and modeling in front of our kids. And yet in writing what I did, I wanted to make one thing emphatically clear: this was my own personal experience and not intended to be a \u201cYOU MUST STOP DRINKING IN FRONT OF YOUR CHILDREN\u201d public service announcement delivered from atop my soapbox. I still enjoy several glasses of wine each week and don\u2019t intend to stop drinking altogether because while my consumption is down, my mindfulness is up. I\u2019m thinking about what I\u2019m doing, I\u2019m actually enjoying<\/em> it, and I\u2019m modeling what I believe is responsible behavior. I\u2019m not laughing about booze or glorifying the cute comments my kids make about \u201cmommy\u2019s favourite drink.\u201d<\/p>\n

Despite the fact that I\u2019ve been a legal adult for twenty-five years, actually acting like one in this area of my life has not been easy.  I\u2019m changing my mindset around what it means to drink too much, what it means to make jokes about drinking in front of your kids and what it means make wine a part of your persona. It\u2019s been a real culture shift within my house, and while I don\u2019t miss drinking three or four glasses of wine per night as much as I thought I would, I do miss being able to check out mentally and not think so much about it. I also miss the sense of entitlement I had around wine, the right to do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted. Sure I\u2019ve already had two but it\u2019s only 8:30. It was a long day and I\u2019ve earned this. I\u2019m an adult and I\u2019m not hiding my drinking from anyone. I\u2019m not getting drunk in front of my kids. It\u2019s just wine, not straight vodka. What\u2019s the harm?<\/em> Pour. Drink. Repeat, that was my habit.<\/p>\n

I wish I could tell you this has been easy, that seeing my words on paper and talking about them publicly horrified and embarrassed me so much that cutting my consumption was a piece of cake, especially in the face of the alternative: being labeled as a mom who drinks too much and doesn\u2019t know she has a problem. But telling you it\u2019s been easy would be telling you a lie. My taste buds checked out when I switched to boxed wine, and my brain was never invited to the party. Now I think about when I want to enjoy the one glass I\u2019m going to allow myself. I try to trick myself with sparkling water in a wine glass, or mocktails. I try working out in the evening instead of the morning because I rarely feel like eight ounces of merlot when I\u2019m still sweating and out of breath. It\u2019s getting easier, but it\u2019s still exhausting.<\/p>\n

Now, I have to think about what I\u2019m doing. I have to think about having one glass only, which means deciding when I want that glass. If I have it at 5:00, I spend the rest of the night going \u201cHmmmm \u2026. maybe just one more..\u201d If I have it at 7:00, I don\u2019t enjoy it as much because my kids are still up and I\u2019m not in relaxation mode. 9:00 seems to be the sweet spot, and since I\u2019m a total rock star who falls asleep between 10:00 and 10:30 (usually with her book on her face), that really only leaves time for one glass.<\/p>\n

I look ahead at my week, too. If I\u2019m going out or if there\u2019s a night I know I\u2019ll likely be having more than one glass, I don\u2019t have anything the night before.  This past week I actually went wine-free for two nights. Not two nights consecutively, but still. This is big for me.<\/p>\n

And of course I wonder: is it normal to have to plan your drinking with such precision? Are there people who have one drink and don\u2019t think a second one? Where are those people and why aren\u2019t they writing books and putting on seminars? My brain is now fully involved in operation Slow It Down and while I appreciate her concern, she\u2019s a real buzz kill in more ways than one.<\/p>\n

When I wrote the original post, most of the responses and comments I got were positive. If it\u2019s a lack of self-awareness that contributed to my over-consumption it\u2019s likely that very same thing that enabled me to share so freely without really considering what I was admitting to. People have since told me they were surprised I wasn\u2019t raked over the coals for any one of the embarrassing habits I revealed with those words.<\/p>\n

But the backlash didn\u2019t come, and that has given me the confidence to keep the conversation going. If you have any strategies for minimizing your drinking and being more mindful, I would love to know them and share them. Comment below or Tweet me at \u2026. ahem \u2026. @wineandsmarties.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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