nathan-crying

How many times have you picked your child up from daycare, your in-laws or your parents and he starts to act out? Whining. Throwing a fit. Not listening.

If you’re a mother, then I’m sure it’s one too many.

He wasn’t like this all day! I swear my child is the best eater, easiest napper and best friend to all when I am not around. What gives? Do I not deserve his very best behavior? After a long work day, don’t I get to see the angel that everyone else sees? Heck, I only carried him for 9 months, taught him how to walk and talk, and gave up the notion of a full night’s sleep for him. I would give my life for this child, can’t he at the very least be happy to see me?

Most times I feel like he’s punishing me for leaving him. Like a housebroken dog that poops on your carpet after you’ve been away for a few hours. “You want to abandon me? Make me miss you all day? Take that!” > Plop! <

After reading this blog post, my SIL told me that kids are 800% worse when their mother is in the room because we are their safe place. They are on their best behavior all day while in the presence of others (even their father) and then you walk in and BAM! They become a total jerk! He wasn’t like this all day! Yeah, yeah, I know.

So not only does my child’s outbursts and whining make me feel like a crappy person, but the person telling me that he’s been a dream child all day is also adding to the destructive thoughts rolling through my tired mind. Do they think I treat my child like garbage for him to instantly change once I walk through the door? Are they remembering what it was like when my hubby and I were little and acting out? Do they find it entertaining, and secretly take pride in knowing that my child likes them more than me? Feeling guilty is unavoidable if you care about your tiny human.

Damn you, Mom Guilt! Damn, you!

I have to admit, when I travel for work and return after what feels like eons away from my only child, he is happy to see me. He shows his adorable smile, hugs me tight and tells me that he loves me. That is the kind of reaction I would love to get when I pick him up after work each day.

Do you believe that your child ‘saves up’ their bad behavior only to unload on you when you pick them up, or come home? They say we always hurt the ones we love the most. Perhaps that is why kids show their true, and often ugly colors to their mother. Because of the unconditional love that we have for each other, they know that we will love them no matter what. But just because I will always love my son, doesn’t mean I will always like him.

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